


Now There Are Two

by TheAsexualofSpades



Series: My Life As A Background Member Of Starfleet [7]
Category: Star Trek, Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Alex has a friend that's an AI hahahahaha, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Banter, Drunk Leonard "Bones" McCoy, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Errybody's sassy, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, MOAR CORRUPT POLITICIANS, MOAR INCOMPETENT POLITICIANS TOO, Plot Aftermath, Sass, also kirk and spock are not subtle, blatant abuse of AI, but we knew that, i needed more bones alex and blackburn being salty so here we go, that's a tag holy shit, we drag Spock in this house
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-07
Updated: 2018-08-07
Packaged: 2019-06-23 03:31:40
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,506
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15597300
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheAsexualofSpades/pseuds/TheAsexualofSpades
Summary: Someone messes up the space-time continuum. This is to be expected, it's the USS Enterprise.What isn't to be expected is an interaction with a future version of the ship with a Black-Ops specialist as part of their crew.It definitely isn't expected for that specialist to be Alex.Thankfully, because Starfleet is used to this kind of debauchery by now, the incident passes without too many ramifications that could destroy life as we know it. That doesn't mean there aren't consequences.





	Now There Are Two

**Author's Note:**

> I had someone ask me more about Blackburn and this was born. 
> 
> Also Bones is a sappy drunk pass it on. 
> 
> ALSO if you have google chrome and you have the extension interactive fics you can replace Alex with whatever you want, kind of like A in other fics
> 
> if you'd like to personalize the series

Bones stumbled as he walked through the door, rubbing a hand over his face. He fumbled the handle as he slid the drawer back to grab the scotch he kept under his desk. He poured himself another glass and tossed it back. A small _clink_ sounded from the main bay. Frowning, Bones poured himself another glass and got up, expecting it to just be the background sounds of the ship. He rounded the corner.

 

“What the hell are you doing in here?”

 

 _She_ was standing there. At the table, cleaning the damn tools. Like everything was still perfectly normal. Like she hadn’t just _whoops_ , revealed she’s not actually a damn ensign, oh no, she’s an agent from a Black-Ops division that existed  _outside of Starfleet regulations_ _._ Oh, and the only reason she’s here is to gather information. She looked up. She had the _nerve_ to look confused.

 

“I’m just cleaning the tools, sir.”

 

“Sir? Really? Think that’s gonna make anything any better?” He snapped.

 

She frowned. “Sir?”

 

“Stop calling me sir!” He yelled. At least she had the common sense to look afraid. “Who the hell do you think you are? You think you can just drop a bomb like that and everything will be just dandy?”

 

He set the glass down on the side and got in her face, slamming his hands on the table. “Are you really so naive that you think we just exist to make sure you can file a report? Do you even care about any of us? Are we just data points to you? Did you even try to work as a Medical officer? Did you actually care about saving anyone? Were we just an assignment to you?”

 

He went back, grabbing his glass before beginning to pace around. “You never cared, did you? Not about me, not about Andrea, not about Lewis, not about Crystal. Jim was just the person in charge. Spock, oh, Spock was the alien that had to somehow ‘fit in’. Oh, but then Erik happened.”

 

Bones stared at her as she flinched, tools clattering against the side of the tray. “You didn’t think you’d actually get involved with anyone, did you? But then the agent thinks, oh yeah, let’s make the orphan feel good, then I can feel good about deceiving the entire crew, right? But then he got trapped on Celtran 7, and you couldn’t save him. The big, important, agent on her secret mission _couldn’t save him._ ”

 

Bones took a breath. That came out rather fast. He hadn’t really meant to say that. He collapsed onto one of the chairs by the other tables at the other end, sitting and cradling the glass in his hands. He looked down and began to mutter quietly.

 

“You can never save all of them though, right?” He shook his head. “Never. There’s always gonna be someone, isn’t there? Someone you can’t save. Why? Why is it like that?” There was suddenly a lump in his throat. “Why can’t we just save everyone? Doesn’t everyone deserve to be saved?”

 

He closed his eyes, clutching the glass. “Why couldn’t we save Erik? What did he ever do? He was just a kid. Why couldn’t we save Lyssa? What did she do wrong? It wasn’t her fault that cave was collapsing. Why couldn’t we get her signal? What happened? Why are we still here and she’s not? Why did I make it back and she didn’t? I just wanted her to live…”

 

He trailed off, voice cracking. “I just wanted them to be safe…can’t we just save people? I just want people to be safe…why can’t we just save them?”

 

He opened his eyes when he realized there wasn’t any more noise other than him. He looked up to see she’d put down the tools and was standing still, facing away from him. She turned around slowly, and began walking over. She was going to yell at him. Like he yelled at her. Tell him it was his fault. _He_ was the one in charge. He stiffened slightly, drawing himself up, eyes wide, trying to get away or do anything that would make her _stop_ walking over. She noticed, but didn’t stop. She stopped in front of him, leaned forwards, and carefully wrapped her arms around him, one hand leaning his head into her chest and the other over his shoulders.

 

Bones tensed when she first pulled him to her before sagging against her, closing his eyes and bracing his forehead against her sternum. Why was she doing this? She didn’t care about him. He just yelled at her. She lied to everyone. She didn’t care. But…

 

His breathing shook as he let her hold him, resting his weight on her. It was easy to lose track of time as they stayed there, not moving. Her steady breathing gave him something to focus on, bringing himself back from the rock in his throat.

 

Eventually, he shifted in her grasp and she let him pull back enough to stare up at her.

 

“Why did you do that?”

 

“Just because I’m not the Campbell you thought I was doesn’t mean I don’t care.” She looked down, gently prying the glass out of his hands. Offering a hand to help him up, she pulled him to his feet and led him back to his office, sitting him down on the couch and handing him a glass of water. Bones huffed before reluctantly taking a sip. He stared at the woman sitting across from him.

 

“What were you doing here, kid?”

 

He didn’t notice her flinch. “Blackburn's team needed information regarding one of the operations in this - “

 

“No,” Bones cut her off, “what were _you_ doing here?”

 

She was silent. “It was the easiest way to make sure the information we got was what we needed.”

 

He laughed drily. “Must be nice. High rank. No need to worry about any of the ‘normal’ stuff. All just ordering people around, and taking all the credit. No matter what happens you’re safe floating on that cloud of privilege. The people beneath you are just tools, not people. Don’t worry about them at all.”

 

She smiled and looked down. “It’s not all just glamor. We worry too.”

 

Bones scoffed. “You just lied to everyone on this ship. You’ve made it pretty clear you don’t care about our feelings. So I’ll believe it when I see it.”

 

———————————

 

Groaning, Bones sat up, holding a hand to his head. That was the last time he stayed out with Jim and Scotty for a while. He frowned as a blanket fell off of his shoulder, and frowned even more when he saw the hot coffee and plate of waffles sitting on his desk. Shaking his head (and then groaning again when his head pounded), drained the coffee and scarfed down the waffles before going into his cabinet for the hangover hypospray. He sighed as he replaced it, the headache slowly receding. He considered for a second before grabbing another one for Jim. Scotty was probably fine. Probably.

 

Might as well bring one just in case.

 

Jim was holding his hand over his eyes to block out the bright lights of the Bridge when Bones arrived. Scotty waved and tapped Jim on the shoulder. He glanced up when he heard the turbolift.

 

“Thank god. Tell me you have the hangover cure with you.”

 

“Maybe I do, maybe I don’t.” Bones smirked as Jim groaned loudly.

 

“Bones, just gimme the damn hypospray. That’s an _order._ ” Bones smiled, giving Jim the injection.

 

“Alright, quit your whining. You sound like a child.”

 

Jim swatted him on the shoulder. An urgent chime sounded from Uhura’s station.

 

“Incoming transmission, Captain. It's a Black-Ops hailing frequency.”

 

“Speaking of children,” Jim muttered, before raising his voice, “On screen. Broadcast ship wide, for the record.”

 

“I’m afraid I can’t do that, sir. It…it won’t let me.”

 

“What do you mean it won’t let you?” Jim frowned before Blackburn's face appeared on the screen.

 

“I am afraid the matter of this discussion must be confined to the Bridge crew.”

 

Bones frowned. Blackburn's mouth hadn't moved. An automated voice had spoken. “Because of this, I will only be broadcasting to the Bridge crew.”

 

“And you are?”

 

“I am the Artificial Intelligence Database Analytics Network. I was built to be the team's AI. Many people just call me AIDAN.”

 

Bones raised his eyebrow. “You’re a PA robot?”

 

“If you like that description, you can use it. It’s inaccurate, but it’ll work.” Can robots be that sassy? Well, Spock…

 

“So what, Campbell finishes her report and suddenly we’re no longer worth her time?” Jim shook his head. “Doesn’t bother with the clean up from her actions so we’re stuck chatting to an artificial receptionist and another operative?”

 

“That’s not _exactly_ what I am.” Was the robot getting angry? 

 

"Alright, enough," Blackburn finally said, "we're not here to debate the logistics of AIDAN's programming, we're here because we need to deal with what happened on the Enterprise. 

 

“Despite the possibly inaccurate description of AIDAN's true nature, you cannot deny that we are not speaking to the agent previously on the Enterprise, despite the fact that we have had previous dealings with you, Blackburn,” Spock broke in. Finally, someone to match Spock in robotic-ness. Was that even a word? “We can only conclude that the agent does not wish to suffer the repercussions of her time spent on the Enterprise.”

 

“Doesn’t say much about the character of the team's other agents. They leave when the going gets tough, huh?” Bones shook his head. “Not getting a great first impression here.”

 

Both Blackburn and the robot were silent for a few seconds. Then Blackburn seemed to wave something off-screen on his end before speaking. “This mission has been classified on the orders of certain Admirals at Starfleet Command. Fortunately, I can share some details because it was your ship. The agent in question is currently one of the team's operatives for my division. You have previous experience with me.”

 

“Funnily enough, we figured that much out by ourselves,” Jim said.

 

“Because of her rank, the agent could have impersonated a Starfleet commander, captain, or even an Admiral. Her security clearance would permit that. In fact, that was the recommendation going in; using the Starfleet clearance was thought to be the only way to gather the information necessary." Blackburn paused. "That was  _my_ suggestion, because it was thought to be the least invasive way to gain the information."

 

"Least invasive," Bones growled under his breath. Blackburn shot him a look but kept talking.

 

"Instead, the agent chose to apply to Starfleet with no guarantee of acceptance, complete the education just like any other cadet. And there was no way of knowing whether or not she would end up on the Enterprise after she had finished. Yet she did. Working two jobs in completely different areas on a starship. And _stayed._ A post of a few weeks would have been sufficient to gather the information we needed. And how long was she on the Enterprise? Six months? Through the mission to Sarita 3, Celtran 7, when she didn’t have to.” Did Blackburn sound...proud?

 

“There is also a program my team runs that guarantees the safety of certain characters that fall victim to time-stream fluctuations. That is reserved for characters with a certain…relevance. Given how the Enterprise crew has been susceptible to these fluctuations, the agent brought the program's importance to my attention. Lyssa and Erik Warner weren’t to enter the program. She made a case for their entry and now Lyssa works in our tech department and Erik is with her. She didn’t need to do that either. What does that say about her character?”

 

The Bridge was quiet. Blackburn continued.

 

“Anyway, the reason for this transmission is that Starfleet is trying to have the crew courtmartialed because of the parallel universe interaction with the future of an alternate time stream. There is currently a hearing in progress to determine what the choice is.”

 

“Captain, we were not informed of this. That is a clear violation of Starfleet regulations,” Spock said. Damn straight.

 

“Because my team is involved, the proceedings are slightly different.”

 

Jim shook his head. “Even so, there should’ve been some kind of heads-up. Who’s there for the Enterprise?”

 

“Who do you think?”

 

—————————————

 

“You don’t even _work_ on this damn ship anymore and you’re still here?”

 

The girl looked up and smiled. “Sorry, sir. Habit.”

 

Bones leaned against the wall by his office. “I still don’t understand why you’d want to stay on this damn ship. They offered you a position in Starfleet security, twice now, and you want to stay here?”

 

The girl shrugged. “I like it here. And the team needs someone embedded in the Federation, and Blackburn's away on another mission, so…” She looked over at him. “Why not?”

 

“Fair enough.” He watched as she went back to cleaning the tools. “Kid, seriously, stop. You’ve done enough for today.”

 

“Not really - “ Bones scoffed and cut her off.

 

“You convinced Starfleet not only to drop the court-martial but we also got _rewarded_ for that damn mishap. Plus, I think I owe you a thank-you from yesterday.”

 

“Okay.” She stopped and packed the tools away. Bones waved her into his office. Sitting down behind his desk, he bent down and opened the scotch cabinet. He offered her a glass. She held up a hand.

 

“No, thanks, I don’t drink, sir.” She got up and went to the replicator. “Lemon tea, hot please.”

 

“Suit yourself.” Bones took a drink as she sat down opposite him. “And stop calling me sir. Seriously.”

 

She laughed. “Okay. What do you want me to call you?”

 

“Might as well just call me Bones, like Jim does. Seems to stick pretty well.”

 

“Is there a reason why he calls you Bones?”

 

He shook his head. “Hell if I know. Just sort of happened. Might be because I’m a doctor.”

 

“I am _not_ buying that the guy who hacked the Kobayashi Maru is _that_ uncreative.”

 

Bones laughed. “Alright. Seriously, there is no shortage of names people call me. Bones, McCoy, Leonard - “

 

“Horatio?”

 

“Except that one. Do _not_ call me that.”

 

“Okay. Wait, no one calls you Leo?”

 

Bones thought. “No, I don’t think anyone’s ever called me Leo. Weird.”

 

“Can I call you Leo?”

 

“Sure.” Bones gestured to her with his glass. “And you are?”

 

“Still Alex.”

 

“Just Alex?”

 

“Just Alex.”

 

“Okay then. Nice to meet you, Alex.”

 

“Nice to meet you, Leo.”

 

Bones laughed. “Now it doesn’t feel like I’m making you call me ‘sir’ anymore. AIDAN and Blackburn said something about your rank, that you could’ve passed as a captain. Is that true?”

 

Alex cocked her head. “Kinda, I mean, ranks work a bit differently for the team 'cause we're not technically Starfleet but yeah. I could have.”

 

“Does Starfleet have an equivalent to what your position or Blackburn's position is?”

 

“Uh…” she took a sip of her tea, thinking, “I’m not sure.”

 

“Well, let’s put it this way. If Blackburn was a commander on a starship, who would you be? A lieutenant?”

 

“…admiral.”

 

Bones set down his drink. “You’d be an admiral? Blackburn's already high ranking, and you’re _above him?_ By _that much_?”

 

Alex smiled. “Uh, sorry?”

 

“Don’t be sorry, I’m the one who bossed you around when you were an ensign.” Bones took a sip. “Damnit, kid.”

 

“You’re actually a lot better than about 95% of all supervising officers,” she said quickly, taking a sip too, “including Starfleet Admirals. Most of those guys are _annoying_.”

 

Bones laughed. “You must have some good stories about Starfleet High Command.”

 

Alex set her mug down. “Honey, let me tell you…” She crossed her legs and tucked the stray hair behind her ears. “So you know how you have to fill out a summary of the stuff you did at the Academy before you can become an officer, right?”

 

Bones nodded.

 

“Well, apparently, that rule doesn’t apply for certain Admirals, because I had to go to a meeting with one of them to _help them remember what they did_ to write it up.”

 

Bones choked on his drink. “Are you serious? An Admiral currently in Starfleet didn’t fill out that part of the enlistment form? Which one?”

 

“You’re not gonna believe me.”

 

“Who was it?”

 

“Vale.”

 

“Wait,” Bones set down the glass and leaned over the desk, “Admiral Vale, the same Vale who was at that hearing after Celtran 7, _that_ Vale didn’t fill out his enlistment forms properly?”

 

Alex started laughing. “Yeah, that one!”

 

Bones smacked his forehead with his hand. “My god, kid. Is that why he was being so rude at that hearing?”

 

“No, _that_ was probably because someone made him feel stupid with an obvious solution to a problem earlier.” She wrinkled her nose. “You should be thankful you weren’t at the Academy when he got corrected by another cadet. He absolutely _shredded_ that kid.”

 

“I take he’s got a pretty big ego, then?”

 

“You wanna know a good way to get some time off work? Climb his ego and jump to his IQ.”

 

Bones burst out laughing. “There’s probably quite a few people you could say that about.”

 

“Really?” He nodded. “Give me another.”

 

“Captain Worstan.” Alex groaned empathetically. “I have no idea how he became a Captain.”

 

“It’s because his cousin works for Starfleet security.” She shook her head. “But I know, right? What’d he do to you?”

 

“Jim and I ran into him at a bar on Tegus 5. He started talking about a mission they went on to some remote planet or other, discovering this new species. Allegedly some form of bacteria, or something.”

 

She nodded. “And?”

 

“Turns out he gave his crew the wrong instructions and they ended up on the undeveloped side of the Beta quadrant mining quarry.”

 

Her eyes widened. “Are you serious? That’s even dumber than what he did at the Academy.”

 

“What’d he do?”

 

“What is the one thing you’re _really_ not supposed to do to a warp core?”

 

“…oh you’ve got to be kidding me. Are you telling me a _captain_ on a _starship_ did that?”

 

She nodded, annoyed. “Yeah, he opened the antimatter valve. And almost blew a hole in the engineering lab. And of course _we_ got blamed for it.”

 

Bones shook his head. “And I thought Jim was stupid.”

 

“Well…” Alex held her hands up like scales. “If you look at the overall picture…”

 

Bones waved his hands. “Stop, kid, you’re gonna make me crack up.”

 

“Yeah, Campbell never got the chance to be that funny.” Alex rolled her eyes.

 

He was silent for a few seconds. “Do you think I won’t like you because you’re not the Alex I met anymore?”

 

She nodded after a while. “I mean, if someone just went ‘hey, by the way, I’m a completely different person,’ I doubt I’d like them that much.”

 

Huffing a laugh, he took a sip of his drink before answering. “You know, I’d agree with you, but no one’s that good at faking stuff like you did with Erik, or at the hearings.” She fell silent, cradling her mug. “I’m serious, kid. The main reason I liked that Alex so much is because she _cared_ so much. Like I do. From what I’ve seen, you care too. I know that’s not what I said last night, but…” He trailed off and took another drink. “You’ve shown you do.”

 

“Thank you, Leo,” she said quietly, “that means a lot.”

 

“Yeah, well, I have to get something in there to make sure you still care about me.” Bones laughed low in his throat. “Spock’s got the strategic value, and Jim’s obviously your favorite, so - “ He stopped when she burst out laughing. “What?”

 

“You think Kirk is my favorite? Why on earth would you think that?”

 

“He _is_ you, kid.”

 

“Exactly, why the _hell_ would you think he’s my favorite?”

 

This time he _did_ crack up. “No seriously, so Spock’s your favorite?” She leveled an ‘are you fucking serious?’ look at him. “I swear to god that’s my expression every day.”

 

“Yeah I know, because you have to deal with this level of obliviousness and stupidity all the damn time.” They both laughed for a second.

 

“Didn’t peg the green-blooded hobgoblin as your type.”

 

“Leo, stop. You are actually going to make me spontaneously combust,” Alex said seriously, “Spock is not my favorite, Kirk is not my favorite, _you_ are my favorite.”

 

“Why on earth is that, kid?”

 

“We’re not on earth, we’re on the Enterprise,” she deadpanned. When he glared at her, she continued, quietly. “I’m serious. You don’t care who anyone else is, you just want to help them. Doesn’t matter who, doesn’t matter what they’ve done, you always do your best to save them. You care about your crew, no matter how much of a corn-fed nerd or a green-blooded hobgoblin they are, and you don’t care who knows it. You tolerate zero shit from anyone, which I really need to learn how to do. And you’re sassy as fuck. That’s good too.” She took a drink.

 

Bones was silent, just staring at her. She held his gaze, then tipped her head to the side and smiled. He laughed and looked down. “Damn you kid.”

 

“Oh and you were wrong.” He glanced back up to see her thinking. “I’m more like you than I am Kirk.”

 

“How so?”

 

“Because I don’t believe people when they say they like me either.”

 

“Yeah, you’ve got me there.” He was quiet for a minute. “Thank you, Alex. That means a lot.”

 

“You’re welcome, Leo.”

 

“Oh, for crying out loud, would you two shut up already? Honestly, I don’t even have a _stomach_ and I’m getting sick.”

 

She made a face and pulled her phone out. “What’s the matter, AIDAN, run out of shit to annoy Spock with?”

 

“Oh please. He’s still bent out of shape over the Gödel’s incompleteness theorem thing Blackburn suggested.”

 

“You’d expect him to know about that.”

 

Bones waved to get their attention. “Sorry, you have an AI in your phone and you’re using him to annoy Spock?”

 

“Isn’t that what you’d do?” AIDAN asked.

 

“Fair enough. What’s the incompleteness theorem?”

 

“The first incompleteness theorem states that no consistent system of axioms whose theorems can be listed by an effective procedure - for example, an algorithm - is capable of proving all truths about the arithmetic of the natural numbers. For any such formal system, there will always be statements about the natural numbers that are true, but that are unprovable within the system. The second incompleteness theorem, an extension of the first, shows that the system cannot demonstrate its own consistency,” AIDAN rattled off.

 

Bones shook his head. “Nope, got none of that.”

 

“Basically, you can’t prove shit is true by using the existence of the shit in the first place because you’ve gotta assume part of the shit is true to use it,” she summarized, “so logic can’t solve everything ‘cause there’s always something you can’t prove within a system.”

 

“Now that I can understand.”

 

Her face lit up. “Ooh, did you tell him he’s a walking irony?”

 

“How so?” Bones glanced at her phone. AIDAN had said that too. He shook his head and took a drink.

 

“The fact that the decision to repress all emotion is an entirely emotional decision.”

 

Bones set his drink down. “I never noticed that. Oh, I’m definitely going to bring that up the next time he says I’m being illogical.”

 

“Only do it if I can see. I want to know what happens afterwards.”

 

“Sure. Next time we’re on the Bridge.”

 

The comm in Bones’ office chirped. “Bridge to Doctor McCoy. We need you up here.”

 

“On my way.” He stood up. “Well?”

 

“Yeah, yeah, sure.” She put her mug down and followed. “What do you think it is this time? New assignment? Incoming transmission?”

 

“Settling an argument?”

 

“Oh, I hope it’s that one.”

 

“Me too. That way I can use that thing you said to AIDAN. What was it, that the decision to repress emotion is…”

 

“An entirely emotional decision, yeah.”

 

“Oh, this is gonna be fun.”

 

“Now you sound like me.”

 

“That’s not bad thing.”

 

“Let’s see how long you think that.”

 

Both of them were sporting identical smirks when they got on the Bridge. Jim looked up. “What’re you two so happy about?”

 

“Don’t worry about it,” they replied. Bones continued. “What did you need me for?”

 

“We need you to settle an argument.” Alex rolled her eyes after Jim had said that.

 

“Which is?”

 

“How long the kid’s gonna stay here.” Jim winked at Alex as she raised an eyebrow.

 

“It is illogical that she would choose to remain here, although I will not insist that she leave.” Spock nodded towards her.

 

“Is that sentiment, Mr. Spock?” She cocked her head to the side.

 

“Sentiment, similar to most emotions, is illogical.”

 

“That’s ironic.” Bones smirked when she turned around and winked.

 

Spock glanced over. “Elaborate.”

 

“You. You keep going on about how emotions are illogical and all that, but the choice to repress all emotion is an emotion-based choice. _That_ is irony.”

 

Jim burst out laughing. “Bones, that is _genius._ ”

 

Spock simply raised an eyebrow. “Fascinating. Did you come to this conclusion by yourself?”

 

“In a manner of speaking.”

 

“Vague answer suggests your response would be negative.”

 

“No, it means in a manner of speaking.”

 

“Clarify.”

 

“The doctor outsmarted you, deal with it.” AIDAN’s voice sounded from Spock’s PADD.

 

Jim pointed to the PADD. “How did you…”

 

“Oh please. I’m an AI, how do you think?”

 

Jim looked at the girl who was trying _really_ hard not to laugh. “Is this the friend that you used to hack the Kobayashi Maru?”

 

“Yeah, that’s him.”

 

“You hacked the Kobayashi Maru?” Bones and Spock stared at her.

 

“Yeah, they changed the parameters so you can do that now. Makes more sense.”

 

“Impossible.” Spock shook his head. “If they have included hacking in acceptable results then they would have increased the difficulty.”

 

“Yeah, and I did it. Well, _we_ did it,” she added when AIDAN coughed. How did robots cough? She pulled out her phone and clicked through it. “I think I need to go back to sickbay; apparently there’s something I need to see. Oh, and Captain,” she called as she began walking back, “I’d get that console cleaned if I were you. Not everyone’s a fan of Jackson Pollock.”

 

Jim’s face went white. “How…”

 

“I’m good at my job.” She smirked as the turbolift doors closed. Jim looked up at Bones.

 

“I am _very_ glad we have her on our side.”

 

“Agreed.” Spock echoed with a paler expression. Bones’ gaze flicked back and forth between to two. Jim noticed his attention.

 

“Bones, _don’t._ ”

 

“I’m not judging,” Bones laughed, raising his hands. “But for the record, I was right.”

 

“What?” They asked. Bones smirked and went back to sickbay. Jim face-palmed as he left.

 

“ _Fuck_ , now there’s two of them.”

**Author's Note:**

> let's be honest if we had an AI friend like this we'd be blatantly abusing it too, look at the DBH fandom for crying out loud. 
> 
> also who's here for idiots in power getting exposed because my life


End file.
